A divorce can be a tough time for everybody involved. It is not a decision to be taken lightly in any respect. However, sometimes it is completely necessary for many reasons. If you are struggling after a divorce, this article will share with you five things you can do to get yourself back on the right tracks.
Often your emotions can be all over the place. Feelings of betrayal, anger and failure are often at the forefront. However, a divorce and enable positive changes in your lives.
So, what positive things can you do after a divorce to help yourself heal and move on?
More often than not there will be some element of conflict in a divorce, as divorces usually happen as one, or both parties, are unhappy in the marriage. By facing this challenge with compassion and respect, hopefully both you and your ex-partner can move on from the marriage in a healthy and positive way.
Keep yourselves calm and centered, allowing your faith to prevail throughout. You cannot ever control how your ex-partner behaves and acts in this situation. But you can control your own actions, and lead by example. If there are children involved, it can be useful for them to see you handle conflict in a wholesome way, with continued respect.
Taking revenge at this point is the worst thing you can do. Try your best to see this as a learning curve and take from the situation all you can. Be assertive by all means, but do it from a place of respect and love for yourself and your family.
“Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
The situation you are in, despite maybe being tough can be turned around to strengthen you as a person. Find comfort in that and learn and grow as a person. Divorce can be a scary thing, but faith can help you to find comfort during this time. Faith should be considered a gift and often becomes more prevalent during the darker times in our lives. Grab hold of your faith with both hands and know that you can handle anything life throws at you.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
Often, when we find ourselves in difficult times, we learn resilience and strength. Time away from your ex-partner can allow you to explore who you are as a person, and can be an amazing time for growth. The bible shows that singleness can be a gift and it should be fully embraced. Use this time to find your new purpose in life and begin to work towards that.
“I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. … I would like you to be free from concern. … An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”
Coming out of a relationship where there are two financial contributors, or where the other party solely contributed, may be difficult. You can be thrust from a life you were comfortable in, to the unknown. This can be hard to swallow. You may even find that you mourn the loss of your old life. Putting yourself back out there, in the world of work and socialization, can be difficult if you haven’t been on that scene for a while. But it is well worth it to take control of your own life and finances. Being independent is a liberating experience.
“But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
You will learn a lot of things as a result of divorce, take these with you into your future relationships. Learn from the past and this will allow you to live a more fulfilling future. Ensure you live an emotionally healthy life. Live with faith and happiness in mind, and the future will be a bright one.
“In the same way, wisdom is sweet to your soul. If you find it, you will have a bright future, and your hopes will not be cut short.”
Hopefully you will be able to make positive changes out of a tough situation. These five positive things you can do after a divorce will hopefully put you on the right path, allowing you to go forth and be happy and fulfilled.